Homily
for August 18, 2017
It is not
surprising that today our Gospel passage centres on marriage given that for the
past two days, our Gospel passage centred on forgiveness and settling disputes
among one another.
Personally,
I see a connection between Jesus talking about forgiving not only seven times
but seventy seven times seven times and Jesus talking about the fact that
divorce is not permissible.
Having being
a priest for just five years (today, happens to be the anniversary of my
priesthood), having heard and seen many marriage cases, I can confidently define
marriage in this way: THE HAPPY UNION OF A MAN AND WOMAN WHO KNOW HOW TO
FORGIVE.
Yes, for
me, the essence of marriage is forgiveness. Without forgiveness, marriage
becomes a survival of the fittest. It is forgiveness that sustains marriage;
knowing that your spouse is not a competitor to you but a part of you. When you
forgive your spouse, you basically forgiving yourself.
For anyone
preparing to marry, just bear in mind that the sustenance of your marriage
would depend on your ability to forgive as many as seventy times seven the same
person over and over again. Once you start keeping records of offences, you
allow the devil take a tiny space in your heart and one day, the devil will
crash that marriage.
When you
are able to live together despite the faults and limitations of each other,
when you are able to overlook and accept each other just as they are without
trying by all means to change the other person, marriage becomes sweet and the
thought of divorce will never arise.
The whole
logic of divorce is that if I get rid of my spouse, there will be another one
better than him or her out there. This is not true! Human beings are human
beings. Expect you want to marry an angel from heaven.
After
speaking about divorce in this way, Peter was shocked. He said to Jesus: “in
that case, it is better not to marry now.” That was when Jesus brought it the
idea of celibacy (eunuchs) but Jesus also added that this is not meant for
everybody.
Honestly,
celibacy is a gift, it is not a natural way of life. There are persons today
who ought to be celibates but do not have the gift, they live a double life and
are not happy! To opt for celibacy simply because marriage is difficult is to
make the greatest mistake of your life. Celibacy like marriage demands
faithfulness. As much as one needs strong self-discipline to be faithful to his
or her spouse, one also needs strong self-discipline to be truly celibate
especially in our age and time.
Marriage
is sweet and beautiful if only spouses learn to see each other as one. Stop fighting
your spouse, keep forgiving, be faithful to each other and keep calling on God
day in day out. Divorce is not an option.
Let us
pray: Lord Jesus, increase faithfulness. Amen
*Be Happy.
Live Positive. Have Faith. It is well with you. God bless you. (Friday of
the 19th Week in Ordinary Time. Bible Study: Joshua 24:1-13 and
Matthew 19:3-12).*
Fr. Abu.
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